Miley Cyrus And The Ten Celebrity Stoners I'd Share A Bong With - kate mara nude hack facebook password ipad 3 2 2 kate mara nude iphone 4 availability katarina witt playboy ipod touch skins stephen curry twitter miley cyrus porn blackberry touch
So Miley Cyrus has outed herself as a massive stoner? Seems like the perfect time to figure out which celebrities would be fun to get stoned with...
The last time I had a bong was in 2005 in a huge house in the Everglades. After arriving at the door and being asked by an NFL shirt wearing jock with a backwards hat (yes, he was a cunt) if I was 'English and fancied a fight…' I sat on the sofa and responded to his question of 'hey Limey, do you smoke bowls' in the affirmative and replied 'but I don't pass them.' To cut a long story short, I caned a bong for 15 people, won a $100 bet and passed out in the bathroom. It taught me two things, one of which being that I should share my bongs if I ever had one again. So here, hot on the back of the news that Miley Cyrus has said that she 'smokes way too much weed,' are ten celebrity stoners I pass the bowl to…
10. Miley Cyrus
Pictures of Queen teenage Dirtbag sucking down a lungful appeared recently and, rather than share a toke with her for any sexual reasons, I'd like to find out if her and Billy-Ray are actually as Hillbilly thick as they seem. That and to spend a night on the porch drinking moonshine, eating pit-smoked raccoon, searching for Mexicans and finding out just how close poppa and daughter are.
9. Cameron Diaz and Drew Barrymore
Pictured earlier this year sharing a 'roll-up', a night on the clipper-deep shoot through coke bottle bongs with this pair of slurring-Californian sex pests could, if you played your cards right (and didn't load the bongs too heavily,) turn into one to tell your mates grandkids about. Glassy-eyed and horny, you could spend the night stroking them, suggesting all manner of doubled-ended horseplay, and being the limp meat in the best sandwich this side of Katz's Deli.
8. Bill Clinton
I met Bill Clinton once, on the 16th green at the K Club after Europe had defeated America in the Ryder Cup. He gave me the limpest handshake I've ever received which I took as evidence that he'd been back on the indo. I later found out that he has 30 different handshakes and I'd received the one reserved for no marks. I also once heard that he allegedly offered a group of golf writers a 'Monica' when taking out a box of Cubans. Skin up William.
7. Megan Fox
"I can't tell you how much bullshit I've been through because I will openly say that I smoke weed," said the Transformers actress earlier this year. No bullshit here Meg, in fact it goes a long way to convincing us that you're not a high-maintenance nutjob who would cut our cocks off at the drop of a hat. You pay, I'll build.
Just imagine it – hiding in suits of armour, whispering stuff to make Prince Phillip think he's hearing voices, winding up the corgi's and having a rifle through her maj's knicker drawer.
6. The Wu-Tang Clan
Too many of their songs contain dope references to mention here, and I reckon it'd be a right crack passing round a monstrous bowl with Method Man, GZA, Raekwon and the rest of Hip-Hop's supergroup. Most people would fancy blazing with Snoop, but why would you want to talk cod-shizzle with that fuckwit when you could talk about brand building with the RZA?
5. Solange Knowles
Following her duet with Li' Wayne entitled 'Champagne Chronic Nightcap' – Solange said 'I don't write about things unless they're true, I'm a grown-ass woman and I've done grown-ass things.' And that is how it would go down, dear readers, because we'd like to know if you could rest a bong on Solange's pneumatic rump and cane it without any spillage.
4. Michael Phelps
The lanky swimmer is not only fond of a bong, but he has an 8 litre lung capacity, and I'd happily sit there and build ounce loaded monsters just to watch his superior caning skills.
3. Brad Pitt
It's no secret that he's a fan of a bucket and, surely, would be much more fun to pass the duchy with than his ex-wife. While Jennifer would park her huge arse in some over-priced pillows and bang on and on about Brad unbelievably leaving her for a woman who draws blood in the middle of sex, you could be sure to mine Brad for some ace information on the merits of his exes in the sack.
2. Prince Harry
Whether or not Harry does grow his own in the palace greenhouse (spoken to lovingly by his old chap) you can't deny how ace it would be to get as lean as pound of fillet steak in Buck House. Just imagine it – hiding in suits of armour, whispering stuff to make Prince Phillip think he's hearing voices, winding up the corgi's and having a rifle through her maj's knicker drawer.
1. Jennifer Aniston
Ok, so she might bang on about Brad but, as sure as THC induces schizophrenia, I reckon you could work this to your advantage. Start by calling Brad all manner of undesirables, tell her that you would definitely be there for her, and you're only a fresh bowl away from encouraging her to don her Central Perk uniform before having a game of hide the corn dog until dawn.
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